addictdesu: (from Haruka-chan)
For the past months, I've been trying to post things other than my obligatory Music reviews and year-enders, but I can't. It seems that my thoughts on things other than the aforementioned subject matters don't matter anymore. No one has made me feel this way, but I do; and I don't know how or why, but I still do.

Just for the week I had two drafts written but I stress over whether to post them or not. For one, the contents speak of being real, and though I don't think I've been pretentious big-time, I know I've also been hiding many things. When there's a flick of courage-mixed-honesty influencing my emotions to write, as soon as I finish the posts I'm back to sucking them up. And there's more guilt in that, because I already prepared my mind to expose--then suddenly I'll snap: Wait! Is this right? Isn't this too bothersome? Is this essential? Resulting in frustration topping frustrations.

I'm frustrated with many things, dear journal, and they don't show. I wish I could talk about them but again, what just happens is the description above.

EDIT (April 10): With the recent major changes that's happened in LiveJournal, its management and the terms, it is like a blessing in disguise for keeping me watchful over the site again nowadays. Moreover, in case anything dire happens to Livejournal, I created a Dreamwidth account where all my entries are imported, and crossposted from now on!
 
Addict I am, A D D I C T D E S U
 
P.S. I have a new "fandom" (not yet full-fledged fan but ugh I'm addicted enough)

 
Even though they're also 4 members now *cries*
addictdesu: (tegoshi target)
Given the fact that I post sporadically and my posts are mostly rambles than true discussions, am I right to call myself a blogger? Or I'm just putting on a stylized tag, feeling like a figure in the blogosphere when I am just an ordinary netizen who makes myself appear intelligent?

So you see, this is also a rant post in itself. Determined and ready to enter the blogging world again, I spent my December and January reading blogs especially from the Idol fandom, which I even filter to the types of posts that interest me--meaning to say, I only skim through a lot of blog posts and whichever catches my attention I will read till the end. Honestly that's how I make my posts too. Many posts aren't thought-out, and the decent ones, rarely completed. The finished decent ones, rare.

This has never been a big deal to me until I saw a string of really good posts from bloggers I casually follow in the height of my wanting-to-blog mood. It's probably rude to say that after years of 'blogging' I just recently realized that even this hobby needs passion more than will, and will more than time. More than a blogger being rhetoric; more than having a Shakespearean sense of humor. Blogging is, in a way, newscasting without your face needing to be seen. I could clearly see Koyama Keiichiro and Sakurai Sho's professional faces in their respective news programs. Maybe blogging is one step close to professionalism?

Or maybe not. Furthermore, this is what blog actually means:



The original purpose of a blog is personal rather than interpersonal. If we go by this meaning, even social networking sites are blogs. It's to my relief that my random ramblings whether in here or on Facebook could be typed as blogging. Most importantly, my love for using hyperlinks is a predetermining factor! When I say "insert link here", oh, I am already running a blog!

If things were that easy, every Internet user is a blogger then. But don't we see bloggers a lot different from mere netizens? For me, bloggers are the brain of the World Wide Web where everyone is a mouth that talks. And that's what I see in my favorite Idol bloggers: They give insights and bring new perspectives to the Idoldom which markets itself as complete and perfect, no more no less. Netizens always have something to talk about; bloggers always have to talk about something.

That contradicts my idea of blogging close to newscasting. Well, honestly, I thought it was not close at all. Blogging, for me, is comparable to storytelling. When I talk about my life or my fandom, it feels like I'm doing either cheesy or bizarre fiction. When I write analysis, a matter-of-factly nonfiction!

However; the point is, I made this post because I am starting to doubt whether my posts are considered blogging in an experienced blogger's sense. Whether it's seeking validation or just wanting to start anew with my blog this year, I want to know if my posts--my pride as a fangirl, belong to the kind called blogs--my main activity as a fangirl, and if I am really a blogger--the title I've given myself as a fangirl. Is it only fair, or should I drop the title? What happened in the trending mishap of Miss Universe 2015 taught us a lesson, that I could surprisingly apply to the "blogger identity crisis" I have today.

Untitled.jpg
1.jpg
2.jpg
Who is the rightful heir to the Blogging crown?
(sources: npr / foxsports / elle)


I want to know if I'm doing it right, but the pride left in me (and a lil bit of fear) says let's not consult this to other bloggers. Instead, I would tend to my own inadequacy, starting 2016 with posts that shout I'M BACK!! even though I'm not sure if this will be regular, or just a moment's spur. Another uncertainty I won't bother finding answers... The main question is enough rattle.

Am I considered a blogger, in the first place?
addictdesu: (from Haruka-chan)
It's been a while since I last posted here! (a week of not staying in LiveJournal is considered 'a while'. LOL)
And I'm back with a TegoMassu layout for everyone (yes, you can use it) ♪

In my lifetime I have made/modified three layouts, but it's my first time to post/promote (because I think this is my most decent (?) layout so far.)

Hora!
テゴマス の LJ layout!  ↓

layout
○○○ clicky-click here for a larger preview! ○○○

Installation instructions, etc. )

Anyway this post will not end if there's no credit! → → → Super thanks to [livejournal.com profile] refuted for the base stylesheet, and the wisdom html codes gave me *cries of happiness*

Comment if taking/interested at least. No need to credit but don't claim as your own ^_^
crossposted on [livejournal.com profile] headbandlovers
addictdesu: (NEWS WQ LE 1)
These people are oh-so-special, not just because today is their day, but because they make me (and everyone) happy:

Happy tanjoubi! )

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Leya

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