3 years in the fandom. This is an anniversary post~

Happy 3 years to us, Yuya. ♥

Looking back, I have already spent about 1,097 days of crazy flailing over you, yet I'm never contented--I'm doing the best that I can to support you but I still feel it's not enough. :(

Why is that so?

Maybe it's because I love you too much that I want to give everything to you but... it's plain impossible. Whatever I do, I am a fangirl. JUST a fangirl. Being too invested in you honestly hurts. *sobs* I love you sooo much yet I can never give this love enough. there's always a gap. T_T

But it's okay, I can take it. In my 3 years of being a hardcore fan I already know one of your ups: the screams and kyaaaas of your koneko-chans. OH I'VE BEEN LIKE THAT EVERY SINGLE DAY FOR THREE YEARS, I AM AWESOME AREN'T I? That alone makes me grateful for having you as my idol, even though I can always choose another. I can, goodness sake! But then again my heart has already clung tightly unto yours and I have no damn plans of letting myself go.

Happy 3 years to us Yuya. Actually, in my long and detailed fandom history, today is my 3 years of being a TEGOMASS fan because at that time I wasn't still a Tegoshi-biased madman, just a young musician who got inclined with Tegomass' music.

So should I say, "happy 3 years to us, TegoMasu"?

And to add another confusion, today is not really the day I fell in love with Tegoshi. It was waaay back 2009, almost 4 years ago.

So should I say, "happy 4 years to us, Yuya"?

Dates and past events are really confusing, isn't it? To make life easier, I made June 27, 2010 the day I officially became a fangirl. So, today is the day I'm celebrating another year of what you call it "a beautiful love."


Yes. Happy 3 years to us Yuya. ♥

I wanted to put a lot of effort in this post, but my brain gets tied up. You know, the butterflies aren't just in my stomach anymore; they flew to my heart and brain. LOL gross. But what should I expect, it's been 3 years and I can't rebuke myself in these crazy acts. Well because it's Tegoshi Yuya's fault.

All that's happening in my life ever since I became a fangirl I attribute to Tegoshi one way or another; it might be too much but it's how an unfair life goes. And I'm apologizing to Tegoshi because I became a worse person. I should be improving because I had found inspiration, but I think I'm going downhill. But Tegoshi swear I'm not blaming you, I am actually frustrated with myself. My flaws. My imperfection that reflects on you my perfect idol ;___;

Gomen gomen gomenasai I'm not a worthy fan >_<


*cries*

LEYA STOOOOOP! THIS SHOULD BE A HAPPY POST! Ufufuu ;~;

Moving on, you know how much I wanted to lift myself out of the deep dark hole of unworthy-ness. With you I can see light, then different shades, just don't make me blind because I still wanna see you in person hahaha xD

And with that I'm dedicating a song--it's entitled Peach by IU (Lee Ji Eun). I chose this song among all our other "theme songs" coz it's simple, calm and lovely, but my delusional crazy self clearly see you in the song's lyrics. ♥ This song is what my daydreams are all about~

(english translation)
My eyes keep going to that white face

Why don’t I even get sick of you?

When you slightly smile at me, I really go crazy

How can you be so pretty baby?

How can I explain this feeling?

When I see you, my heart becomes numb and sore

Oh, with what word can I explain you?

All the words of the world is probably not enough

With those legs that are so pretty by just standing still

You walk toward me and you hug me

You know he’s so beautiful

Maybe you will never know

I want to hide you in my embrace

I’m not saying this out of a young heart

But I really want to marry you

Oh, with what word can I explain you?

All the words of the world is probably not enough

With those legs that are so pretty by just standing still

You walk toward me and you hug me

Telling you multiple times is not enough

With this tickling voice

that only knows you

I will sing for you

My heart keeps going to you

I’m really going crazy

Happy 3 years to us, Yuya. I would not say more. ♥